Kelsey Cleveland LLC

Desire Map Facilitator | Freelance writer

What Is the Most Powerful Choice You Can Make?

Choosing How You Want to Feel Every Day of the Year

Aligned. Bliss. Buoyant. Connection. Creative. Curious. Ease. Flow. Fun. Free. Hygge. Peaceful. "Wellthy."
 
I’ve been choosing how I want to feel each day since 2015 when I devoured The Desire Map book. This is not a once and done process. Each year, I select five or six feelings that will make me feel good every day.
 
My select list of feelings is my Core Desired Feelings. Before we go any further, here’s the definition from Danielle LaPorte, the creator of the Desire Map method: "Core Desired Feelings are how you want to feel most of the time –– your most preferred states of being. They're life-affirming feelings –– positive and expansive."

Six years later: How Core Desired Feelings evolve

2020 marks the sixth time I’ve declared my feelings for the year. Each of the 13 words above made the cut for at least one year. I chose them from among hundreds of positive feelings words. Some of these words stood the test of time, others lasted a year.
 
Wherever you are on your Desire Mapping journey, here are the feelings I declared each year.

2015: My first Core Desired Feelings

  • Aligned
  • Bliss
  • Curious
  • Hygge
  • Peaceful
Sometimes the words to describe how we want to feel don’t exist in our mother tongues. I chose the Danish word hygge which incorporates cozy, at ease, and connection. I’m not sure I even pronounce it correctly.

2016: Second year of Desire Mapping

  • Aligned (2nd year)
  • Bliss (2nd year)
  • Creative (NEW)
  • Curious (2nd year)
  • Free (NEW)
  • Hygge (2nd year)
I said goodbye to peaceful after decided that hygge incorporated that feeling. Also, I added creative and free, which both stayed for several years.

2017: Third set of Core Desired Feelings

  • Connection (NEW)
  • Creative (2nd year)
  • Flow (NEW)
  • Free (2nd year)
  • Hygge (2nd year)
  • “Wellthy” (NEW)
Aligned and bliss were bid farewell. I added two new feelings: connection and “wellthy.” I encourage my clients not to get a case of bright, shiny word syndrome, but it happened to me with the word “wellthy.” Jason Wachob, Founder and CEO of mindbodygreen, coined the term. He defined it as a life exemplified by abundance, happiness, purpose, health and joy.”
 
Two lessons you can learn from this:
  1. The feeling doesn’t even have to be a word found in the dictionary.
  2. Beware of shiny object syndrome. There are so many positive feelings out there. It is tempting to hear a feeling word and add it to your core desired feelings.

2018: Year four of Desire Mapping

  • Creative (3rd year in a row)
  • Curious (2nd time)
  • Deep connection (added deep to connection)
  • Free (3rd year in a row)
  • Hygge (4th year in a row)
After 2018, “wellthy,” my shiny object, went away. I had nothing against flow but wanted to be able to list all my feelings with my five fingers.

2019: Fifth-anniversary edition

  • Creative (4th year in a row)
  • Curious (3rd time)
  • Deep Connection (2nd year in a row)
  • Free (4th year in a row)
  • Hygge (5th year in a row)
News alert! This year, for the first time, I didn’t change any of my Core Desired Feelings.

2020: Core Desired Feelings to ring in a new decade

illustration of choice of feelings
  • Buoyant (NEW)
  • Creative (5th year in a row)
  • Deep Connection (3rd year in a row)
  • Ease (NEW)
  • Fun (NEW)
After a challenging 2019, I said goodbye to curious. Why? I realized this feeling and characteristic are part of me, so I don’t have to remind myself to feel this way. Hygge got replaced by ease. After a very heavy year, I added buoyant and fun to help me start the new decade.
 
How do you want to feel this year?