Kelsey Cleveland LLC

Desire Map Facilitator | Freelance writer

Decade in review

For a Better Year, First Do a Decade in Review.

Can you believe we are entering a new decade? Were you planning to take time to step back and reflect? Don’t miss this opportunity, which only comes around every ten years. I sometimes can only tell how much time has passed when I look at photos of my son, who has gone from age 2 to age 12.

I take moments to reflect every week, month, season, and year. This year, I’m taking it up a notch. I’m going to take a 10,000-foot view on the entire decade to gain some perspective.

Danielle LaPorte’s The Desire Map and Free + Clear, as well as Marie Forleo’s decade in review, inspired my process. 

Ready to begin? We’re going to start taking a look at the highs and lows. What worked and what didn’t? It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. You get the idea.

STEP 1: HIGHLIGHTS + HAPPINESS

We’ll start with the highlights and what made you happy this decade. What was positive and fulfilling? Enjoy this chance to reminisce on all the good. 

Go with what comes to your heart first. Don’t filter your stream of consciousness. Over the past ten years, what did you do, have, experience, or give, which felt great? What achievements are you most proud of? What gave you the most joy? Not all highlights are external. Did you have any significant insights or healings?

Set a timer for 5 to 15 minutes. Reflect.

Next, I ask them to close their eyes and smell the honey. Does it smell sweet? In researching this article, I learned honey has a variety of smells. Bright and citrusy. Floral. Fruity. Fresh as grass. Smoky. Woody. Earthy. Nutty. It can even smell pungent like aged cheese. Who knew?
 
I ask them to open their eyes and to observe the texture and consistency. Thin and runny? Thick? Smooth? Has it crystallized?
 
I save the best for last, tasting the honey. I ask participants to let the honey melt on their tongue with their eyes closed. Savor the flavor. Discover both an initial taste and then detect other subtler flavors.
 

STEP 2: LOWLIGHTS + STRUGGLES

Now, we go to the dark side. Yes, I’m a Star Wars fan. Think about challenges or events which brought up negative feelings. We all have our struggles. What experiences caused you to stress or suffer over the last decade? What are the obstacles you’ve overcome?

Again, no need to filter what comes to your heart. Set a timer for 5 to 15 minutes and don’t stay in this dark place for too long. 

STEP 3: CALENDAR/RESUME/ PHOTOS VERSION OF HIGHS AND LOWS

Gather up your paper or digital calendars. Open up your photos app. If you choose, find your resume or listing of your professional accomplishments. Your heart told you the answers first. Now, you get to use data to remind you of other highlights and lowlights. 

Give yourself time to write out the highlights and lowlights of each life area. If possible, spend more time being grateful for the highs than dwelling on the lows.

HIGHLIGHTS:

  • Livelihood + Lifestyle: 
  • Body + Wellness: 
  • Relationship + Society: 
  • Creativity + Learning: 
  • Essence + Spirituality: 

LOWLIGHTS: 

  • Livelihood + Lifestyle: 
  • Body + Wellness: 
  • Relationship + Society: 
  • Creativity + Learning: 
  • Essence + Spirituality: 

STEP 4: WHAT DID YOU LEARN?

Ready for a potential surprise? Compare the two lists from your heart and then a view of all your life areas from the facts. How do they differ?

The differences can be telling. For example, my heart highlights included almost no career or professional highlights. Also, without a prompt, I ignored essence and spirituality. Did you neglect any of your life areas? Were the majority of your highlights or lowlights in one area? Were you surprised you didn’t include anything in your heart listings? 

Out of all the highlights, what jumps out at you as most important? How did you feel in those moments? In your lowlights, how do you not want to feel again? Did you make any mistakes that caused a lowlight? What can you learn from your mistakes?

Did this exercise teach you anything? Or are there other critical lessons learned or wisdom gained? My most significant aha was the discovery that feeling good is my primary intention. I also realized prioritizing people, experiences, and my health matters more to me than my career. 

As we move into the new decade, what key lesson do you want to remember? Mine is that as a mother, the days at times feel long, but the time is short. My son will go off to college during this decade. I want to make the most of his time at home. 

STEP 5: HOW DO YOU FEEL?

How do you feel about the highlights and lowlights you uncovered from the last decade? If there are things you did well, celebrate and congratulate yourself. If something didn’t go as planned, don’t criticize yourself — just the facts ma’am.

STEP 6: LET IT GO

Picture Elsa from Frozen singing Let it Go. Follow her lead. What can you let go of? Projects? Goals? Things that anger or upset you? Are limiting beliefs or crappy stories holding you back? Which of these things would feel best for you to let go of and why?

STEP 7: DREAM ABOUT YOUR FUTURE

Brainstorm what you want to do, have, experience, or give over the next ten years? Only chose things that will help you feel how you want to feel. Think about all the areas of your life. Livelihood + Lifestyle. Body + Wellness. Creativity + Learning. Relationships + Society. Essence + Spirituality. They can be big dreams or simple things that bring you pleasure. 

What five things would you LOVE to focus on in the next decade? What will amplify the joy in your life? 

BONUS STEP: TIME TRAVEL TO THE FUTURE

Write a letter from your future self ten years in the future to yourself now. What does the future you want current you to know? 

To make this even more interesting, you can send an email to yourself ten years in the future. To learn more, read Want to email yourself in the future?